After spending half of Thursday and half of Friday getting settled in at my newest digs, it was time for some personal maintanence before the car show on Saturday. That meant shaving legs, blowing out my hair and getting my nails done. Two of those I could do on my own, but on and off for the past 30+ yrs., I have had my nails done. Never having nice nails when I was growing up always bugged me (and the fact that I always bit my real, paper thin nails down to the quick as a nervous habit). So I like my nice, long, fake nails, sue me. They are the only fake thing about me.
I picked the closest nail salon to the KOA, loaded the dogs into the back of the Tahoe on a gorgeous, sunny, cool, high of 78 day and headed out. Happy Nails was located in your average, run of the mill strip mall that every town is full of. Shops after shops after shops. By the way, sidebar; WHY do we need so many goddamn shops in the world? Are there REALLY that many people in the world now that it warrants stores everywhere you look nowadays, with more being built all the time? What happened to the days of everyone just going to their own town square for whatever they needed? What does it say about us as a society that we need to buy and go and consume 24/7? Bugs the fucking shit out of me, but anyway back to HAPPY NAILS!!!
I walked in desperately in need of some R&R. I was tired, road worn - baby needed some pampering. The Universe answered the call and then gave me a raise. A pleasant gentleman helped me at the counter with what I wanted and another pleasant young lady escorted me back to the pedicure massage chair. A pedicure was definitely in order too today, as my feet were a mess from a month on the road. And hey, I’ve always been one of those people - do it right or don’t do it at all. If you’re going, might as well go all the way, right? She handed me the “pedicure menu”. I looked over all of the fancy pedicures and chose the basic one for $25. She then asked me what I wanted to drink. I clearly had a drink in my hand that I had brought with me, but she insisted that a drink came with the pedicure so I told her water would be fine. She returned a minute later with a huge liter bottle of SmartWater (worth $3 in the store) and handed it to me. I blinked; what parallel universe had I just entered?
As she got the water to the perfect temperature and eased my feet into it, I settled back into the chair and customized the massage remote to my specifications. Ahhhhh, god yes. Almost better than sex. I got so into the pedicure and the massage, the water, the feel of someone rubbing my feet, that I conked out. Not something I usually do in public, but she was REALLY going to town on my feet. When I noticeably came to, she smiled and asked me how I was feeling. I looked at the clock and realized that she had been rubbing my feet for almost 20 minutes now non-stop, BEFORE she even started my pedicure!
Suddenly, as if in a Twilight Zone moment when the actor realizes he’s been had, I sat bolt upright in my chair. Wait a minute, where am I? What kind of place is this? It turns out, I had entered - Nail Salon Nirvana. Yes that’s right, I just said in my best Rod Sterling voice, Nail Nirvana. Such a place as this I never knew existed. I slumped back down into the massage chair, started it up again, and asked my pedicurist her name. “Ali” I thought she said, with her thick Vietnamese accent. “Well Ali”, I said, “This is flat-out the best pedicure I have EVER had in my life; you are very good at what you do, thank you!” She beamed and rubbed my feet even more vigorously, obviously happy with the compliment. As I had been listening to the quiet of the shop when I had my eyes closed, now I looked around me in awe. Everything about this little salon was perfect - from the hand painted seascape murals on the walls to the music, the vibe, the people, and everyone all harmoniously co-existing and laughing together. I was astounded. This was not your average, run of the mill nail place in your average, run of the mill strip mall, no siree! The whole salon was also spotless, not dusty and drab like so many nail salons are. Tired places where the employees just show up to work the same old grind everyday and have lost the caring and pride that should come with any job well done. There were no phones ringing (they had their calls screened beforehand), no rush-rush, just hush-hush. I was in heaven.
My “basic” pedicure was anything but. I have no idea how many things she did to me but it included an exfoliating scrub, hot towels on my legs, a paraffin treatment in which your feet are placed into plastic bags for 5 minutes in scented paraffin (I chose lemon), massaging my legs and feet for half an hour, and THEN the pedicure where they trim your cuticles, buff the bottoms of your feet, and apply polish. After more than an hour in the massage chair, I was finally done. I was incredulous - shut the front door, this place is THE SHIT, who does this anymore, gives this kind of service?
A lady walked by. I asked Ali if that was the owner. She said no, the owner was over in the corner booth by the door, doing someone’s nails. Once Ali got done with my pedicure she walked to the main counter as if to ring me up. “No no”, I said, “I’m getting my nails done too”. I looked at the clock; I had come in at 5:30 pm, plenty of time to normally get both a pedicure and my nails done. It was now 6:50 pm and they closed in 10 minutes. “Shit”, I thought to myself, “now I don’t have time and the car show is tomorrow.” “Do you have time to do them tonight?” I asked. Ali smiled a wide smile again and said, “Good because I didn’t want you to leave!” Awwwwww! I love her and I love this place, can I live here? AND she was going to stay past closing, happily! Again, where did these people come from?
I followed her over to the booth in the corner and watched as she spoke in low tones to the owner. They both blushed and looked over at me; obviously Ali had told her what I had said to her about the best pedicure ever. Now embarrassed, I stepped forward and said, “You are the owner? I’m Eli.” She introduced herself as Lucy and I then proceeded to gush over how well run her shop was and how she should be very proud of herself. I told her how long I had been getting my nails done, over 30 years, and how hers was the best nail salon I had ever been in in my life. I was amazed at how bowed over she was by the compliments; I simply couldn’t believe she didn’t hear these things everyday, as she certainly deserved to. It was actually visable what my praise did to her - she came alive like a flower I had just watered, straightening up from the slight stoop that life had lain upon her and smiling like she had just won the lottery. Amazing the little things we can do each day to lift each other up, I thought. Lucy told me that Holly (not Ali) was her cousin and oldest employee. I complimented Holly as well and told Lucy she’d better hold onto her as she gave the best pedicures in the world.
Ali proceeded to take another hour to do my nails as perfectly as she had done my toes. It was now 8 pm and she started to clean up, insisting that I sit and dry and keep her company. I did as I was told. I really didn’t want to leave either, but the dogs had been in the Tahoe all this time (with the rear hatch open, animal lovers, and it was dark & 68 degrees by now) and I also had yet to go to the grocery store. I obliged her for 10 more minutes before finally telling her I had to get on my way. Just then an elderly lady came by and started to attend to the multiple large vases of flowers that lined the center of the room. “Those are REAL FLOWERS?” I almost shouted, “You have got to be kidding me with this place Lucy! They looked so perfect I thought they were fake!!”. She just laughed and I told Holly that unless I broke a nail I would most likely never see her again. We hugged and for the first time ever in my life leaving a nail salon I actually felt sad, as if I was betraying Holly for not moving to San Luis Obispo and getting my nails done there for the rest of my life. Believe me, if I could, I would. It would sure be worth the move! So if you’re ever in the area and need some Happy Nails, please go nowhere else, for they are indeed the epitome of what doing Gonzo Nails is all about, along with giving the best service of ANY business up and down the 7 Cities Coast!
Happy Nails, 3971 S. Higuera St., San Luis Obispo. Tell ‘em Eli says “Stay Happy!”
Until next time, I’m living small and loving it largely.
Eli “The Gonzo” Hunter
For full photo album of complete trip, follow me on Facebook @ https://www.facebook.com/eli.hunter.94
