IT'S TIME FOR ALL OF US

From the beginning of developing relationships in my life, it has been one struggle after another between what they want and what I want; this is not the way things are supposed to be. Up until now, I have always given in to what they wanted, no matter how banal or stupid, and suffered because of it. When I think of all the things I could have accomplished during all those wasted years, I get so depressed because I realize I did it to myself. A good connection between 2 ppl shouldl consist of mutual respect for the other's beliefs, desires, wants, needs, goals, and feelings. I have never personally experienced this in any relationship in my life, and after having spent the last 10 yrs of my life largely alone, I have come to the conclusion that I am fine with this if this is how I am destined to live out the rest of my life. The relationship I have developed with MYSELF has become far more valuable than any other I have had with another. I enjoy myself and who I am now, I no longer seek or even desire outside validation or approval, and that right there is enough and brings me so much inner peace I cannot tell you. I am not looking for anything different from anyone else; as a human I desire and deserve compassion, warmth, understanding, friendship, passion, and a true love of life from the people and world around me. What I instead attracted to me all those decades long ago was fear, imprisonment, emotional desolation, and setback after setback of my own personal goals. I wanted to blame everyone else, and did, but it was all me and how I felt about myself that determined who came into my life, I see that now. I was in a prison of my own making. We live and learn from our mistakes, or at least that's the hope. That's what life is all about. It's not about what happens to you, but how you choose to respond (not react) to it that matters most. For me, self acceptance, forgiveness, and self love has been an over 40 yr journey for me but I finally made it. So here's to freedom, sweet freedom at last! I do not hold hate in my heart any longer for those who did me wrong, and believe me, there was a long line. Hate only begets more hate, and there is already far too much of that in the world, I refuse to participate in it anymore. Instead I simply hold hope and pray that the evil and corrupt and perverse will someday have all of the love they've been missing come into their lives, to the benefit and change of us all and this world we ALL are a part of and live in. For I believe the days are gone now where women (or anyone) is willing to lie down along the wayside and allow the white man to succeed and cum on their backs, while they spend the entire rest of their lives following along behind, picking up after, the remnants and scraps of another's glory. It's time FOR ALL OF US to succeed, it's time FOR ALL OF US to be. ELI HUNTER, DATE UNKNOWN